Sunday, March 11, 2012

Screen Went Dark

Last week, I was using my MacBook and left it for a few minutes to check on my dinner. When I returned the screen was dark. "No problem," I thought, "the sleep mode just activated." I tried to wake it up, and nothing happened. My computer had died. 

As I sat staring at a dark screen, I tried to figure out what to do. I had been saving up for a new Wacom Tablet (used instead of a mouse) since my tablet has a short in the cable and isn't working properly. I wasn't saving for a new computer—yet.
I thought maybe....just maybe, if I tried to restart the computer it would "magically" fix itself. Nope, that didn't work. I tried all the "tricks" that the Techs taught me, but nothing worked. The computer was dead. 

I tried to figure out, my next step. I couldn't even research new computers online, since my computer was dead! It's amazing how "attached" I had become to my computer and the Internet. Information was always at my fingertips. I started thinking through what I could do, and started to put together a plan to replace the computer. The Wacom tablet would have to wait.

As I lay in bed that night, I was talking with God about the computer and the entire situation. I had to smile. God wanted to teach me some lessons and He knows that I learn best visually. So, God provided an object lesson to teach me more about Him and my relationship with Him. 

Some of the lessons God taught me

The Dark Screen
I'm in the process of making some decisions regarding my pain management. One decision I've been having a hard time making is in regards to my spinal stimulator (like a pace-maker for pain). My stimulator is broken and either needs to be replaced, or removed. I've been praying about my decision but in actuality I don't just want to know if I should remove it or replace it—I want to know: 1)will the new one work?, 2) will it give me problems?, 3) is it worth the money?, 4) will the surgery cause more damage to my back?—I want to know ALL that will happen in the future.
However, God doesn't work that way. He knows those answers—I'm to walk by faith and trust Him. If He guides me to have the stim removed. Then I need to trust that He'll supply other ways to manage my pain. If He guides me to have the stim replaced, that no matter what happens, God has a plan and purpose and will use each and every aspect of the stim to accomplish His purpose.
Yes, as I look at the "screen" for answers regarding my stim, it's DARK. But God knows exactly what is on the screen. He is the SOURCE of knowledge and WISDOM. He'll supply the knowledge and wisdom necessary at the precise moment and time.

No Information Highway
I like information. I like to study. I like to research. And I even research the research. When I my computer died, I lost my connection to the Information Highway. I have been enjoying my study in the Book of Job. Using the computer, I've been able to read commentaries and do word studies as I work through the Book.
When I went to have my study time, I had my Bible. No internet. No computer. Just my Bible. At first, I was frustrated that I couldn't do my "normal" study. But once again, God wanted to teach me a lesson. "Rhonda, read the Bible." Just, "Read the Bible." So, I did. I started reading and realized that some times, I get so caught up in the details that I forget the "big picture". It was a joy just to read the Book of Job and see what God is teaching throughout the Book. Now, I'm going to make it a point, to "just read" the Book of Job each week, not looking at the specifics, rather just seeing what God is teaching in the Book as a whole.

No Connection with Friends
Email, Facebook, Twitter have all become "lifelines" to friends. It's so easy to email, post, or tweet about what is happening. But with no computer, no internet—how do I connect with friends? I picked up the PHONE! What a blessing. To talk with friends and reconnect using more than 140 characters. To get caught up on what is happening in their lives was such a blessing. And now I know better how to pray for those friends. I plan to use the phone more in the future. 
Today, a friend called me and was such a blessing. She even took time to pray with me over the phone. Yes, the computer has made connecting easier, but are we really connecting? Or are we simply sharing general information, jokes, pictures, etc. Perhaps, it's time to make time to really talk and listen to others and let them know that I care and that God does too.

Hopefully, as I work on my new MacBook, I'll remember the object lessons God taught me when the "Screen Went Dark".

Some of you might be saying, "But wasn't that an expensive object lesson?" Depends on how you look at it. Since God takes care of all my needs, I'm not worried about how to pay for the new MacBook. I did my best to research prices and find the best price for what I need. I'll tighten my budget a bit more and do what I can to pay it off as soon as possible. I've learned over the past 11 years, that God is VERY creative in supplying my needs. He is VERY capable of paying for the new MacBook instantly. But if He chooses not too, that is okay too. I'm sure no matter how God takes care of this need, He will teach me another lesson in how He cares for me. And the truths I learned from the object lesson, the "Screen Went Dark", are priceless!

Creating a positive day when the screen goes dark, is possible! It all depends on if you focus on the darkness or the Light of the World—Jesus Christ and His amazing love and grace.